So.  Here we are.

Anyone who has been around me for more than, say, a day knows I hate my job.  Wait, not the job really.  I hate my career.  Always have, likely always will.  It’s not necessarily the company I work for, IT IS THE JOB.  And for whatever reason, it is worse than it has been for a few years.  Not exactly sure why, it just is.

I won’t rant about how it feels to be in a nearly impossible pit of misery every day to make a living, at least not in this post.  🙂  Nope.  This is more about how to make the leap from the reality of life to something less soul sucking.  Something that actually means something and makes a difference.

Going through cancer treatment last year made me realize how meaningless my work is to the world in general.  I make people unhappy nearly every day and it is getting to be very toxic.  I feel driven to do “something” that makes a difference.  The trick is to figure out what that “something” is.

So I dunno what to do.

I did work on the book today, first time in many months.  I decided I needed to do that before starting anything else.  hahaha

Those last sentences were avoidance sentences.  Why?  I am hesitant to say what I’m going to type next because typing it makes it “real” and that makes me accountable.  Not that anyone is reading anyway.  🙁

What is rolling around in my brain is figuring out a way to create a place for cancer patients / survivors to do arts, crafts, and meditation as a way to relieve stress.  It’s a great idea but would take a lot of work to make happen.  Oh, and money.  Would take lots of that, too.

But the idea keeps nagging at me and that means I have to do something about it.  Either banish it forever or try to figure out how to make it happen.  Will definitely take more thought to decide which way to go.

Sometimes you just have to throw these thoughts out to the universe to see what happens.

Consider it thrown.