I mostly put that pic up there for inspiration, not because it really has much to do with this post.  😉

We’re making progress here I suppose.  Perhaps the prayers and positive thoughts are working.  When I crawled into bed Wednesday night, I suddenly became very angry that the oncologist doctor’s office hadn’t called me back.  It was just one of those things that festers in your head and won’t go away.   When I get upset, the dog gets agitated.  There was very little, if any, sleep for either of us Wednesday night.

First thing Thursday morning, I called and left a message for the nurse practitioner at the gynecologist office telling her I was very upset with twisting in the wind for four days.  She called me back right away, calmed me down and made some calls.  She is definitely an advocate for her patients because the doctor’s office called late Thursday afternoon to set the appointment…which will be this Wednesday morning.

Friday was the most productive and least anxious day of the entire week.  Of course, I was so far behind by then that it was almost ridiculous.  I worked a couple of hours Saturday morning (hateful, but had to be done).

Not exactly sure what will happen Wednesday, though I suspect a date for the surgery will be discussed.  Hard to say if it will be before or after the holidays.  Hard to say which would be better or worse – get it done and ruin the holiday or ruin the holiday by thinking about it?

On the upside, I managed to get some things accomplished this weekend and will be going out to dinner with a friend later on today.  All good.  One of the things on the to do list was to finish clearing out the spare bedroom so my brother will have a place to sleep when he gets here (that is a whole other blog post).

All that work over the past few months paid off in spades.

What used to be a cluttered room with boxes piled on the floor is now a room with boxes on shelves and a few stacked along the wall.  That’s it.   It was the highlight of the weekend!  There are a few other things that need to be done but having that room cleared out is major.  As I worked in there this morning, I was thinking about how it looked a few months ago.  If I had been faced with that now, I would have been even more overwhelmed.

As for now, I’m trying to stay grounded in the present.  I’m trying to not think or obsess about what “might” happen.

Perhaps that quote really does have something to do with this post.  Nearly everything I have to face over the coming days, weeks, and months ranks up there with my greatest fears.  There is no choice, there is no hiding, it will have to be dealt with.

Thank you for standing behind me as I make this difficult journey.  It means more than words can say.